I'm A Lumberjack and I'm OK!

I eat pancakes all damn day! Or at least I did today. FREE Denny's Grand Slam. Which led to me realize, this is leading to this weeks blog. So, who else knows pancakes... hmmm... OH YA! IHOP! Yes, remember those days as a kid when you and the folks took a lazy saturday trip to the International House of Pancakes. Or maybe it was those late college and post college knights, when you get out of the bar at 2am(damn early closing) and remember(like all other nights) that IHOP is still open! YES! Pancakes, eggs, french toast, steak, biscuits and gravy. Everything your body needs to help aid you in progressing its purge agenda(I have never vomited after IHOP, can't say the same for many people in the Philly suburbs). So here I am, one grand slam down, or as the rest of America calls it, a Lumberjack breakfast, hence the title. Pancakes, eggs, sausage, bacon, hashbrowns. Now todays free breakfast at Dennys did not include hashbrowns, but don't you worry, I know, and I know their hashbrowns as well... Its 2 blocks from my apt and open 24/7!

And away we go!

Lets start with the eggs, this should be easy. I went over easy at both places. Did either egg taste any better, not at all. But as with any date, first appearances are important. The IHOP eggs came looking perfectly cooked with the yolks dead center and the whole thing a nice circle. Dennys, well... not so pretty. Score 1 for IHOP.

On to the meats! Bacon first. Now, bacon is great, no matter what. But not all bacon is created equal. Denny's bacon looked quite flacid and not hugely appetitzing. Taste was ok, texture was a bit to uncrispy. IHOP on the other hand looked beautiful, like Sports Illustrated Swim Suit issue hot! just the right amount of crispiness to go with great bacon flavor. YUM! Now, I wish I could say Dennys' sausages made up for it, but they didn't. Small, lacking that bite you get when you dig it, and kinda bland. IHOP, well, aside from being bigger(size matters, we all know it), it also was crispier on the outside and juicier and tastier on the inside. A clean sweep for the IHOP meat.

Moving on to spuds, the hashbrowns at both places are actually quite similar, though for once, I feel like they were crispier at Denny's, so by rule, I give them a victory here. Or I would, but I won't. Why? Because my hashbrown loyalties lie elsewhere. For those of us who have lived or visited the dirty south, you know, deep down in your soul, that the words Scattered, Smothered and Covered mean something, and it didn't come out of a snuff film. Yes, Waffle House is the standard bearer for hashbrowns, now and forever. 

So finally we come to pancakes. Both come with the requisite artery clogging ice cream scoop of butter, which is totally unnecessary but always used. And we wonder why this country is fat and has high cholesterol... Side by side, really, they aren't too far apart in goodness. But IHOP I felt was a bit lighter and fluffier, which means you can eat more of them(and IHOP has an unlimited pancake deal running, so that is key). But the real trump card that throws IHOP far past Dennys, is the syrup. Dennys gave me a little glass on syrup. IHOP gave me 4 BIG bottles of strawberry, blueberry, butter pecan and original syrup. Which means that each bite can be a totally different experience. And oh I loves me some butter pecan!

So yes, Its blatantly obvious that if you are a lumberjack in the wilderness of America and you are hungry, go to IHOP. And for the rest of you, go to IHOP as well, unless you crave hash browns, and then pray for Waffle House.

Turtleheads forever!