The Not-So-Angry Whopper

Funny how it happens that again it is a rainy day in San Francisco and I am eating fast food. Today's battle, the original Whopper vs. the Angry Whopper. Now, it has probably been a solid 6 years at least since my last whopper, so lets rehash shall we since I'm sure many of you haven't had one in a while either. What makes the whopper special? flame broiling? maybe. I definitely caught the smell and flavor of the flame process, though in watching them prepare my burger, I saw no actual flames, just a steamed patty. Ah the power of chemicals. The addition of a pound of not so real mayo with a pinch of ketchup sounds out the flavor here, with the addition of crunch lettuce, which may be the best part of the whopper. So as you can tell, the original may not be faring so well in the first place, which means the Big Mac may be safe.
Moving on to the Angry whopper, all the things that aren't great about the regular whopper are drowned out here by the overwhelming taste of the not-so-angry, quite tangy and tomatoey spicy sauce. Yes, there is a hint of kick at the end, but nothing "angry", even when I got a big bite full of jalapenos. So the burger is mostly drowned out. And then there is the 2 slices of bacon, that serve absolutely no purpose but to charge you more money, because they too are drowned out, as is the cheese, so lonely and melted. Again, this sandwich has crunch, both in the lettuce and in the "angry" onion rings, which being fried is good for crunch, useless for taste. Basically, in the end, you are left with the overwhelming taste of the tangy, not spicy sauce.
The verdict: both sandwiches are losers, don't waste your money on either. The only thing angry in the end will be your wallet and your stomach(2 whoppers and a hangover is a bad idea)